The Abused Submissive

From the beginning Code d’ Odalisque has been a response to situations in which submissive females feel misused, misunderstood, abused or violated. It is important to realize that this is a central part of the mission of Code d’ Ode – to provide a new deal for such women. We still receive emails from women telling the same story. They are submissive by nature and by temperament, and as such they find fulfillment in submitting to men. They are drawn to Dominant/submissive relationships. Unfortunately, though, this has brought them into contact with men who misunderstand or misuse submissive women. In particular, they have encountered men for whom dominant/submissive means sado/masochism. Submissive women often find themselves in S/M scenarios. Men assume that “submissive” means that they are turned on by pain, or that they want to be cooks and housecleaners. In reality, many sub women are sexual submissives. They like to be used, sexually. Their instinct is to give themselves – their sex – to men. This does not mean that they want to be spanked, whipped and have pegs put on their nipples. And it does not mean that they want to cook and clean all day.

Code d’ Odalisque is for women who are sexually submissive. But they respond to pleasure, not pain. They don’t want to be whipping bags, or housemaids, or objects of cruelty and degradation. They just want to be used, sexually. They are not volunteering for violence and abuse. They are volunteering to be used as a willing pleasure slave, used and instructed by a dominant, horny imaginative male. They don’t want to be tied up in a dungeon and caned. They want to be tied up in a bedroom and fucked long and slow in any way her Master chooses.

We hear from many women who have had very bad experiences in the BDSM scene. They have been beaten, whipped, scarred, brutalized by sadistic men. Advocates for the BDSM community often deny that this is a problem. Our experience is that it is a real problem. There are abused submissives.

Of course, some sub females respond to pain. They enjoy being trashed and tortured. But many sub females are sexually submissive – this doesn’t make them masochists. Such women often find themselves subject to violence. They are easy prey for sadistic men.

It is important not to confuse a “submissive” with a “masochist”. A masochist enjoys pain and degradation. As such, they are also “submissives”. But while all masochists are submissives, not all submissives are masochists. There are submissive women who do not respond to pain and degradation. They are often ill-treated. That is a fact.

Code d’ Odalisque offers a non-violent alternative for such sexually submissive women.