Overmistress - a discussion

Questions and answers on the role of the Overmistress under Code d' Odalisque. 

Q: Why does a slave have to have an Overmistress as well as a Master?

A: It is not essential for an odalisque to have an Overmistress. But she may if she wishes. It is up to her.

Q: I wouldn’t like my girl answering to an Overmistress as well as me. I expect my girl to answer only to me.

A: An Overmistress is not a Slavekeeper in any sense. An odalisque does not answer to her Overmistress. An Overmistress is not in charge of the slave. Her role is simply to protect the slave.

Q: Protect her from what? From her Master? I would object to that. As her Master, I expect to be in control.

A: You are in control. A slave answers to her Master. She doesn’t answer to her Overmistress. But an Overmistress acts as a type of friend and mentor. She doesn’t control the slave. She provides back-up support for the odalisque. It is a safety device. If the slave feels she needs it.

Q: But this Overmistress can interfere. I wouldn’t like that.

A: She only intervenes if the slave is in danger or is being mistreated. She shouldn’t interfere, as you put it. That is not her role. She is not a Slavekeeper. She is an older female who provides oversight and makes sure the slave is okay.

Q: But a slave would only want this oversight if she didn’t trust her Master. That’s no good. I object to that. I expect trust. Trust is submission.

A: Yes. An Overmistress is only back-up support. It doesn’t change the fact that a slave must trust her Master. But Code d’ Odalisque is designed with safety, consent and legality in mind at every stage. Some women might feel the need for that extra back-up support. In that case, she can choose to appoint an Overmistress. The Code puts the slave’s safety ahead of all other considerations. That’s how it should be.

Q: But it undermines the authority of the Slavekeeper.

A: Not at all. The Master/slave relationship remains intact. But an odalisque is a special type of slave. Let us keep that in mind. Here is a woman who – voluntarily – will give herself to a man to be used for sex. There are lots of things that could go wrong. The best way to protect against that is to have extra people involved. Experience shows that problems arise, when they do, in situations of isolation. If something goes wrong, the slave needs someone to turn to. The Code allows for formal arrangements to provide extra safety. If a woman is prepared to offer herself as a sexual slave for sexual use – which is a big deal – she is entitled to arrangements to ensure her safety and security.

Q: What sort of things could go wrong? What do you mean?

A: There are plenty of men who might abuse their power. There are plenty of cases of that.

Q: So you don’t trust Slavekeepers. You’d only need an Overmistress where there is no trust. And if there is no trust, then the slave shouldn’t be a slave at all. That’s how I see it.

A: But you might argue the same thing about slave contracts. If a slave trusts her Master why would she need a slave contract? Or you might say, in marriage, if you really love me and trust me you won’t need a pre-nup. But let’s be realistic. Marriages fail sometimes, which is why people take out the insurance of a pre-nup. And Slavemasters abuse their power sometimes, which is why slaves have contracts and why the Code allows for an odalisque to have an Overmistress. It is insurance. The fact is, once a woman is immersed in the slave role she often loses a strong sense of self. The odalisque’s life is for submissive women, anyway. Often, by nature, they are not inclined to stand up for themselves if they are being mistreated. An Overmistress is there to look after her. Not to interfere. It doesn’t undermine trust. It permits trust. If a woman has an Overmistress she will feel more secure and will be able to submit to her Master more fully, knowing that the Overmistress is there to make sure she won’t be harmed. Trust is all very well, but it is sensible to take precautions. As the Arab proverb says, "Trust in God, but tie up your camel first."

Q: But you assume that Masters are bad people. Slavemasters love and care for their slaves. If a man needs an Overmistress looking over his shoulder, maybe he is not fit to be a Slavemaster.

A: Be realistic. It is a power relationship. Sometimes some men abuse it. It happens. There are plenty of cases. Ideally, Slavemasters are sane, sensible, caring gentlemen. But that is the ideal, not the reality. We need to allow for the possibility that things might go wrong. Like what? Well, for example, some men might be tempted to prostitute their odalisque. That happens even among middle class swingers. Husbands start charging men to attend swinger’s parties where their wife is the main attraction. Making money from a sexual slave is a real temptation. An Overmistress would prevent this. An odalisque is not a whore. A Slavemaster is not a pimp. An Overmistress would provide the extra over-sight to ensure this and prevent a slave from being taken into whoredom.

Q: How does she do that?

A: She meets with the slave from time to time. She has access to the slave. And the slave can turn to her for help. Then the Overmistress would speak to the Slavemaster about it on behalf of the slave.

Q: I think I’d resent someone interfering like that.

A: Some men would. Some “doms” are authoritarian and want complete control. But an odalisque deserves extra protection. Odalisque slavery is non-violent but it is also intense. It is sexual submission. Sex is a powerful energy. The slave is used for intense sexual adventures and fantasies. Don’t underestimate it. You might think that because it is non-SM then it is “soft” and “vanilla”. But an odalisque is subject to constant, intense sexual use. Her Master can use her to explore quite extreme fantasies. Very sensibly, Code d’ Odalisque frames this within structures that help ensure it is safe, consensual and within the law. And so no one gets hurt. If a man won’t accept that a woman who gives herself to sexual slavery wants to feel secure and safe in her role, then he fails to understand the nature of odalisque slavery. It is an intense form of slavery. The woman’s need for safety and security is far more important than a Slavekeeper feeling peeved about an Overmistress “interfering”. Safety comes first. It comes before the Slavekeeper’s rights. Only in the context of safety and security can a woman truly surrender herself. So it is in the Keeper’s interests too. If a slave has an Overmistress then a Keeper can take play that much further because there is that extra safety device.

Q: But some Overmistresses might interfere…

A: That could happen. But then she would be a poor Overmistress. An Overmistress is not some dour old bitch who wants to kill people’s fun. She must know the limits of her role. She should only intervene when absolutely required. Mainly she just stays friends with the odalisque, gives her some company, makes her feel secure. An Overmistress also wants the odalisque to be used as an odalisque. She wants to see the odalisque used and fulfilled in her role. She wants the Master/slave relationship to go smoothly. In most cases, the Overmistress doesn’t really have much to do. She is just there in case. And in lots of cases, as I say, an Overmistress is not necessary. It depends.

Q: Depends on what? And who decides?

A: The slave decides. If she wants an Overmistress, then under the protocols and structures of Code d’ Odalisque she is entitled to have one. But it depends how she feels about what she is getting herself into. She might think to herself, “Wow. I’m going to be used as an object. I’m going to have my brains fucked out. Men are going to use me relentlessly. I’m going to be kept for sex. Maybe I need someone to be looking out for me in this.” That would be reasonable, wouldn’t it? Especially since a lot of Code play is very psychological. The slave can be trained into an obsessive monomania. We fuck her body, but it is a mind-fuck as well. Once she is involved, immersed, she may lose objectivity and not be able to defend herself from an abusive or dangerous situation. An Overmistress is an objective pair of eyes. But if a couple don’t plan on exploring sexual extremes then an Overmistress wouldn’t be required. Code d’ Ode is designed like that. You can use odalisque slave play to explore sexual extremes. Then the slave would benefit from the caring overview of an Overmistress.

A new promotional video

A new promotional video for Code d' Odalisque. Enjoy.

(Original footage and images plus technical assistance thanks to Jojo and Hudson.) 

NEW VIDEO - Third in the series

To celebrate the turning of the year, here is the third video in this series. We wish all our supporters and the worldwide odalisque community, Slavekeepers and their beautiful slaves, all the best for 2014.

(Music by The Residents. Some original homemade footage and technical assistance thanks to jojo and Mr Hudson.)

Different traditions

In order to place Code d' Odalisque and consensual odalisque slavery within the whole spectrum of contemporary erotic lifestyles, it is necessary to acknowledge and delineate divergent erotic traditions. It is fair to say that most people are probably ignorant of these various traditions and tend to have insular views, regarding their own way as the only way. Mainstream BDSMers tend to be like this very much. There is something disturbingly smug about many people in the 'scene'. They look down their noses at so-called "vanilla" people and sneer at anyone who does things differently. Among BDSMers generally, the SM crowd are especially prone to this. They tend to treat people who are not into SM as inferiors, as people who are not into the 'real thing'. But in fact, the SM side of the BDSM spectrum is only one tradition among many. Specifically, it is a tradition with its roots in the French Revolution. The great spokesman of the tradition was the Marquis de Sade who explored and defined a genre of eroticism based in the reflexes of sadism and masochism. Some of the features typical of the tradition are: chains, whips, leather, torture, clamps, wracks, dungeons etc. You know the stuff. It is a tradition that eroticizes pain, fear and violence. More recently, this tradition - often developed in association with military culture - has sometimes taken the name 'Old Guard', so let's call it that for want of a better name: the Old Guard tradition.

But not everyone within the BDSM spectrum is into sadomasochism. There are other traditions. One of these has been beautifully rendered by John Norman in his World of Gor fiction series. While cast as science fiction, Norman in fact evokes a world of noble Barbarian culture. The Gorean lifestyle that has developed from this is founded upon ideals of naturalism, with its chief motif being the right of the strong to rule. Male dominance and female submission is seen as a natural order that, when properly restored, allows for an innate beauty and dignity in both Master and slave. This has very little to do with Marquis de Sade and the 'Old Guard' tradition. The Gorean tradition - a modern invocation of an ancient order - is not about eroticizing pain, fear and violence. It is a different tradition. Often, in on-line BDSM chat rooms, Goreans converse with Old Guard types. Their conversations are at cross purposes. They belong to very different traditions with very different philosophies and ideals. Goreans, it must be said, often do not fully appreciate the extent to which their tradition is different to the French Revolution Old Guard tradition in both principle and practice.

Then there is odalisque slavery. It is a tradition of female sexual submission. It does not draw upon models from the French Revolution and it does not look back to the models of tribal Barbarians. Instead, it looks to the historical slave traditions of the ancient and medieval Orient. This is a sumptuous slavery that served a hedonistic culture of urban traders. The odalisque is a specifically erotic slave. The odalisque lifestyle is for sexually submissive women. But there is no sadomasochism involved. No dungeons and whips. The natural arena of the odalisque is the bath and the spa and the boudoir. This is a very rich tradition that once fascinated the imaginations of Europeans. There is a rich tradition of odalisque imagery in European painting and early erotic photography. Code d' Odalisque is a revival of odalisque slavery as another alternative within the broad range of erotic possibilities. It is specifically female submissive, and submission is specifically sexual. The implicit philosophy is hedonistic - the sophisticated man's pursuit of new pleasures. Plainly, this is a quite different thing to either Old Guard or Gorean modes of consensual slave play.

A lot of very annoying sniping goes on between advocates of these different traditions. A lot of misunderstanding and disagreements could be avoided if everyone acknowledged that there are different ways for different people. Some people respond to sadomasochism. That should be respected. Some people feel fulfilled by the Gorean lifestyle. That too deserves respect. It also needs to be ackowledged throughout the wide BDSM world that there needs to be an alternative for submissive females who do not respond to pain. They are submissive, but it is a sexual submission, and it is not suited to the 'Old Guard' lifestyle. Code d' Odalisque is a third way. Odalisque slavery is a different tradition again.

Only for rich men?

Question: Is keeping an odalisque only for rich men?

An odalisque is a luxury slave - she is not one of the essentials of life. So any man who struggles to maintain the essentials - mortgage, medical fees, loan repayments etc - should not add keeping an odalisque to his financial burdens. An odalisque is an indulgence, like a sports car or a yacht. Clearly, not every man can afford one.

On the other hand, keeping an odalisque is not the preserve of only the filthy rich; it is possible for men of relatively modest means to purchase and keep a cockslave. It is quite possible to keep an odalisque on a decent middle-class income if one is prepared to forgo other luxuries in order to pay for her. If it is what a gentleman really wants to do, and he is sufficiently well-off to meet all the essential obligations in life, then he can easily reorganise his finances in order to accommodate her.

Ideally, an odalisque is entirely kept. This means that her Master keeps her in occlusion and pays for her; she does not have to work. In Code d' Odalisque, work is a characteristic of low slaves (memlooks) and an odalisque, by definition, is "preserved from toil." Indeed, it is a travesty that an odalisque should have to get her hands dirty with common labour. It is an outrage that an odalisque - an object of beauty - should ever have to work in a factory or at menial tasks. By definition, an odalisque is lifted above labour. She is kept. Ideally, a man who owns an odalisque should be able to provide for her entire up-keep in order to preserve her from labour.

In today's conditions, however, this is not always possible. For financial or for other reasons, it is often the case that an odalisque may have to earn some money at a part-time job. The rules of the Code allow for this. The slave may go on "sojourn" like a freewoman between the periods when she is held in active "occlusion". We know of many cases of this. For many couples, there is no alternative because they would struggle to live on a single income. The woman (odalisque) plays slave to her Master as often as possible, but she goes out to work (or study) on a part-time basis in order to supplement their finances. This is not ideal, but it is often necessary.

If that is the case, then the odalisque should only be required to do suitable work and should be protected from any injurious labour. For example, she should not do any type of work where she might get burnt or where it will impact upon her beauty. She should not be a dishwasher, for example, because that type of work will age and damage her hands. She should not be a bricklayer; hard physical labour will age her and make her skin rough and damage her beauty. If an odalisque must go out to work, it should only be to part-time jobs and jobs that are soft, clean and light. Light labour only. Secretarial work would be suitable, for example.

Other than having the slave work part-time, there are other strategies that can help make keeping a cockslave a viable option. Most importantly, Code d' Ode is a social form of slave play. An odalisque is bound to a single man (her Slavekeeper) but, by default, he is to share her. It is quite possible for a group of gentlemen to contribute to the maintenance of an odalisque. She can only be bound to one Master, but she may be enjoyed by a circle of gentlemen. Her Master cannot prostitute her - a Slavekeeper is not a pimp! - but there is nothing to prevent an agreement between gentlemen concerning the maintenance of an odalisque.

Similarly, let us remember that an odalisque is, by definition, extra-marital. In many cases, husband/wife couples play Master/slave, but it is not necessarily the case. It is possible for a married couple to acquire a slave for themselves. In that case, the slave will be bound to the husband as her Slavekeeper, but she plays the role of sex toy to the married couple. In such cases, the combined income of the married couple is enough to support owning an odalisque. (This, of course, requires an agreeable wife.)

How much does it cost? There are different estimations. In the past, we have quoted the figure of $12,000 a year, but this has proved to be inflated. That figure works out at about $250 a week. We have, however, spoken to Slavekeepers who put their costs at much less than that - barely $100 a week.  Figures can be very rubbery, though. The main pitfall is health costs. Provided an odalisque remains fit and healthy, costs can be kept to a minimum. There are no clothing costs. Feeding an extra mouth doesn't take too much extra money. But if she needs medical attention, it can start to get expensive and go well beyond $100 a week. That is life. Life often has many hidden costs. This should be taken into account.

It would be wrong, though, to say that owning an odalisque is only for rich men. It is more accurate to say that it is not a game for poor men. Experience shows that any man who is relatively settled in life and who is gainfully employed can, if he is keen, make the financial adjustments in order to keep an odalisque. It means not buying so many CDs, not spending $150 for tickets to a sports game, and cutting back on other luxuries. An odalisque is luxury enough. If a middle-class gentleman cuts back on frivolities and other indulgences, and manages his finances well, there is no reason why he cannot afford the pleasures of an odalisque.

VIDEO - The Odalisque's Life

This is the second in a series of video promotions that capture and illustrate aspects of Code d' Odalisque. The series, which we will roll out in the New Year, will include multi-media presentations with audio lectures. Enjoy. Please feel free to share and distribute it to those who might be interested. We appreciate any efforts to bring Code d' Odalisque to a wider audience. 

Karsya - formal begging (repost)

17.8. - Karsya

An odalisque shall be trained in the formal mode of begging to be used in cock worship. The slave falls to her knees, clutches her Keeper's legs, rests her cheek on his thigh such that his crotch is near her face, and she begs him for cock in this position. She begs directly to his cock. It is called "Karsya", face to face or eye to eye.

Article 17.8 of Code d' Odaliusque describes a method of cockworship called "Karsya", a term meaning 'face to face' or 'eye to eye'. This is very simple. The Slavekeeper can be standing or sitting. The odalisque falls to her knees, clutches hold of his legs and places her cheek on his thigh so that her face is then directly facing his cock only inches away. In this position, she starts talking directly to his cock. She does not address her Master here. She addresses his cock directly. She begs. She implores. She might say to it, "Please fuck me... Please fuck me...Please let me serve you.." She speaks in a passionate whisper and begs the cock to let her serve it.

This method of begging for cock - or begging TO cock - is called 'Karsya'. If a Slavekeeper commands his slave "Karysa!" then she falls to her knees, hugs his legs, puts her cheek on his thigh and starts begging his cock that she might serve it and worship it.

The method of Karsya should be included in the training of an odalisque. She should learn how to beg in this manner to her Master's satisfaction.